I say yes. Geoff says no. And of course I'm right, because that's just how it works at our house. I'm right and he's wrong (at least 110% of the time ;-)
Ok, enough funny business. I haven't blogged for a while because I've busy studying for school, working, and of course playing hard (psst -- I live on Cope Court. Duh). But mainly the school thing has been kicking my butt. Each week I've had to write a paper including one team paper, read, research, etc etc. I think one week I studied a total of 20 hours. So I guess you could say there was a little learning curve for me. Creative writing is sooo much easier than writing academically. Citing sources and making sure your not plagerizing is serious business. But it was worth it because a few things have happened.
1) I stopped saying "this is hard" or "how am I going to do this?" or "this is impossible" because its not. It's totally possible and although it is challenging at times I keep telling myself that most things that are worth doing are (challenging).
2) And when the girls are complaining that I don't have time for them (guilt), I stopped saying "Mommy HAS to work" and "Mommy HAS to go to school" and thinking to myself "no body understands!" But the truth is I don't have to work. We could survive on Geoff's salary, we just wouldn't be able to do and have all of the things we enjoy. And I don't have to go to school. But I want to because I think that later down the road I'm going to need it. Plus it tells my kids with action that education is important. So I guess what I'm saying is I'm making choices.
3) No more guilt. The time I spend with my kids is good, quality time. They know I love them becuase I say it and show it. I'm a good mom and they are ok (more than ok).
4) I have any amazing support system. I am soooo lucky and so are Geoff and the girls. I started to blog about all of the people in our lives that give us their never ending support and love, but I got too choked up so I stopped. Maybe someday I'll put it all into words. For now I'll just thanks to you all. You know who you are.
5) And finally I realized last night that my hard work paid off because I got 100% on my paper on Team Diversity and 97% (darn that spell checker) on my Values and Mission paper. I had to hang the 100% paper on the frig last night with the magnet that says "Look what I did at School!" This week I really felt like I turned the corner. And I'm actually learning something. One of my goals for going back to school was self-confidence and self-respect. All I can say is that I already feel smarter. And for me being in class with other working adults has been an eye opener as well. We all compare ourselves to others and I usually tend to see how they are better than me (that's just how my brain works). But in this class I am seeing that I'm a very competent, intelligent person. I'm a good communicator, writer, organizer, problem solver/critical thinker, and master multi-tasker. And although I try not to get that "I'm better than you" thing going on in my head, I have seen first hand how determination, hard work and a positive attitude can make all the difference. And maybe next week I'll be overwhelmed again and down in the dumps but for now I'm just basking in the sun.
So I think when someone says "I gave 110%" what they are saying is I did more than was asked of me. I went beyond the expectations given me. And as Claire put it, "Dad, its like doing the extra credit on the test even if you don't have to."
Poor Geoff. He doesn't have a chance.
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1 comment:
Nice to see you back blogging! I think 110% is not possible for everyone - maybe some people are working at 110% just to get by, and for some others, they can normally slide along at maybe 90%, but when called on, they can dig deep, and pull out the extra 20%. However, keeping asking for the extra percent usually leads to burn out, so keep recharging those batteries! And congratulations on your great grades - I'm proud of you - you've come a long way since we first met!
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